Super Sonic   +  relax

The Minimum Code of HouseKeeping Conduct

Mushi mushi blogoroonies,

I have a confession to make. I'm a bit of a foxymoron. As has been previously established, in some things- such as editing my blog posts for typos, quitting smoking and mopping my floors- I am not only a chronic procrastinator, but also chronically lazy.

In some things. In other areas, I have been called both obsessive compulsive and anal retentive.

Meh. There are worse things I could be called, I suppose.

Anyway, the point here is that when it comes to keeping my house neat and tidy, I am irrepressible. Even gastro or the flu cannot keep me from completing the daily Minimum Code of HouseKeeping Conduct. Not exhaustion nor illness nor heat nor disorganization shall stand in my way.

There are days when I am almost too tired and decaffeinated to keep my eyes open. I'll try my hardest to ignore the mess, to meditate and count sheep and Prada sandals. But I cannot, for the life of me, fall asleep with a sink full of dishes.

Just in case anyone is interested, the Minimum Code of HouseKeeping conduct goes something like this.

* Three beds made.
* Liberal splashings of pee wiped off toilets, and any icky bits given a quick scrub with the brush.
* Washing hung out, including nappies, bibs and numerous facewashers.
* Dinner made. Most nights, anyway.
* Washing bought back in, folded and put away. (Groundhog Day, anyone?)
* Kitchen cleaned up, sink shiny (thanks a lot, FlyLady)
* One hundred million toys, three dozen books and an assortment of random household items returned to their natural habitats.
* To Do List studied, sighed over and returned to it's place on the bench, un-crossed-off-ed.

Once all of those chores are completed, then, and only then, can I relax. Do some Tweeting. Have a shower, Fall into the blessed cocoon of my bed (for two hour increments, between being woken by the small people).

I will confess that, at my best, it takes me all day to get through that list, and sometimes that's all I get done. While the kids are up and about and awake and bouncing off the veritable walls, the house is feral. It's only once they are in bed that it gets clean. And by then I'm about to go to bed anyway.

With that in mind, I'm actually not 100 % sure why I adhere so strictly to the MCHKC. I mean, let's face it, if there's a fire or a bomb threat or something as unforeseen as that, no one is going to be running around "Holy crap, where are the kids? But wow! Check out how tidy their house is!".

And we don't often get visitors who drop in at 2am. Not now we have kids.

But I just cannot go to bed with an untidy house.

Especially an un-shiny sink. Ick. Leftover dishes gross me right out.

Way back in the BC (Before Children) I used to have a Weekly Minimum Code of HouseKeeping Conduct, as well as a daily one. It included vacuuming, mopping, dusting, and changing the linens. I'm almost embarrassed to admit that is now a more of a once a fortnight thing. Sometimes less. I try, I promise I do. I just don't always seem to get there. Before I know it, it's Friday again and I'm still trying to catch up with Monday's work.

So, there you go. Lori and her neurosis, in a nutshell. I think I'm looking for validation. Surely I am not the only one?

Do you have a Minimum HouseKeeping Code of Conduct? And do you actually follow it, every.. single... day?